Bewbs

Yesterday was a beach day at a quiet closed gate community beach of which we are members. Really, that sounds snootier than it really is. When we first bought into the community, there used to be a logging gate at the front. Now the community sports a fancy automatic gate with a lighted keypad. Much cooler but still, not a pretentious gilded gate.

All it really means is that when we are there, usually there isn't anybody else there. Increasingly agoraphobic in my old age, I can't stand fourth of July's crowds and noise. Give me a sunny beach with nobody else for miles. Perfect.

Last fourth of July, we were the only humans we saw all day. It was heaven. Yesterday towards the end of our stay, we shared the beach with a bunch of 20 somethings who only came as sunset approached. The family in the neighboring house came by with two young boys around 8 or 9 years old and settled in to watch the 20 somethings burn their enormous pile of fireworks.

My girls were playing in the remnants of sunshine while Hubby and I sat in our beach chairs reading our books.

The 20 somethings were all having a bunch of fun -- whiskey and beer were being bandied about. The neighboring family was preparing a pitcher of mojitos to share. It was getting pretty festive.

I'm only telling you all of this so you can imagine the scene.

I turned around to see a 20 something girl wearing a string bikini chatting with one of the 20 something boys. One of the neighbor boys was turned in his chair away from the fireworks being shot over the water so he could stare right at her. That's when I realized that she was having a wardrobe malfunction ala Janet Jackson... well, more of a peeking nipple. In my surprise I turned to tell my husband that there was a wardrobe malfunction only to find that he'd already located the offending nipple himself.

He said, "I wasn't sure if I was seeing it right but then that boy seemed to be looking in the same place so I figured I was right."

Dirty old man.

I actually was going to walk over there and tell her if her boyfriend didn't manage to notice himself. Good on him, he did. I think the huge clue would have been the 9 year old boy sitting not 5 feet in front of her staring at her chest. Or the 44 year old dude sitting 20 feet away trying not to look like he's staring at her chest but still staring at her chest.

How early does that whole horndog thing start? And does it really ever end? Early and apparently not.