The Wedding Planner

Yesterday evening, on the most auspicious day of 8/8/08, at 8:08pm, my friends Julie & Joe got married. Thousands of people (especially Chinese folk) got married yesterday because of the number 8 which means good fortune (wealth) in China. Joe and Julie aren't Chinese, but I think the idea of all those eights, especially since this is the 8th year of them as a couple, they thought it a great idea to get married on the day.

And it is all my fault.

I didn't introduce them or anything like that. What I did do was nag Julie to the point of annoyance which all came to a head last week Sunday at the beach. I struggle with this because I've been told many times by people who love me that I have no tact. Because self-loathing is something I'd like to rid myself of, I embrace my tactlessness. Anyway, back to the beach. I said to Julie, "So, are you two ever going to have a ceremony?" Which led to a discussion about the 8/8/08 day. When I told Julie about its meaning in the Chinese culture, I think it really captured her imagination. The following day, she called me and my co-conspirator Sharon with the news that her friend Lissa was going to host it at her fabulous waterfront property and the wedding was a go.

You didn't read that wrong. There were 4 days to plan and do this wedding.

I've reflected on that idea a lot. People always say that you need a good year to plan a wedding. I think that is a whole lot of hooey. See, it is all about expectations. If you have a year to obsess about how a wedding should look and how people should dress, and what the favors should look like, and what color bows to put on the chairs -- YOU WILL OBSESS ABOUT THE MINUTIA, simply because you can. When you have 4 days to put together a wedding, you get to be much more big picture. This was a big picture wedding.

The invitations were sent out by email. Of the 80 people invited, about 70 showed up. Remember, that was on 4 days notice. The bride's father and the groom's parents who live out of town, made it to the wedding. It was amazing. Friends and family, even the best friend of the bride's father made it to the wedding. It was truly magical.

The minister is a friend of Joe & Julie's. He's a total hoot! I talked to him on Thursday to get some music figured out for the wedding ceremony. I also suggested what I think is the perfect wedding song, but the few couples that I've suggested it to in the past have nixed it. It is Grow Old with Me by John Lennon, covered by Mary Chapin Carpenter. Thursday at 10 pm, I checked my email and found that Mark had decided that I should sing the song while he accompanied me on the guitar. A perfectly balanced person would balk at that idea especially with no rehearsal time.

I am not perfectly balanced.

I wrote Mark back and told him that sounded great. And since I would be singing, then Sharon would do the reading during the service instead. Turns out that it was a joke. Mark was not ready (in one day) to get that song in performance mode so I called his bluff. I was a little disappointed that I didn't get to sing it but should I ever attend another wedding where Mark is officiating, I'll be sure to sing it then.

I ended up herding cats all evening long. Getting the kids to stick around for the formal pictures, getting the guests to gather for the actual wedding, getting people to gather for toasts, making sure the couple had champagne in hand to have the toast... truly, it was challenging. There is the fact that you cannot legally use a cattle prod on guests at a wedding. Nor can you taser the groom so that he'll stay in one place while we're taking pictures. (No, Joe, you may not go back to the car to get something.) You cannot tastefully use a megaphone at a wedding. You cannot yell at people to get moving or they'll miss the wedding. And yeah, Minister Mark, I get to tell you to start at 8pm, and it was a gift that I gave you 8:08pm. I get why real wedding coordinators get paid so much.

And the other cool thing about weddings is seeing people you totally don't expect to see. I got to catch up with a college friend whom I've not seen in about 17 years. We didn't even know we had Julie in common. Amazing.

All in all, it was really great. One of the guests brought fireworks to set off. When they were announced as Mr. & Mrs. they had the fireworks overhead. I cried a little during the vows and couldn't believe that I had forgotten the rule to always wear water proof mascara to weddings. I didn't raccoon too much. Sharon stole my napkin to pass to the bride to wipe her tears leaving me defenseless. Bah.

It was a good day for romance.